I have heard the expression "burning the candle at both ends" countless times throughout the course of my life, but lately the message behind the expression is really starting to resonate with me. I seem to be literally tripping over people who are burned out, exhausted, harried and generally hanging by a very thin thread of energy. It's got me wondering if this is 1) a symptom of our over-producing society 2) our need to have more (money/status/things) or 3) the place most of my peers are at in life which typically involves a house, a job and a couple of kids.
Regardless of why it is we all seem to be so strung-out and stretched-thin the fundamental question remains: Is all of this running around actually getting us anywhere?
My new boss was rushing last summer to cut his grass on a Friday evening after working a long week before heading out to a concert with his wife that evening. He went over a hill in his back yard and the tractor landed on top of him. He was badly burned on much of his upper body and is lucky to be alive. When he came back to work with pictures of his injuries his comments were "I was moving too quickly trying to get too much done in not enough time. I need to slow down." I couldn't help but think this was the Universe sending a quiet message to me through him.
Not long after this incident my family and I went on vacation to a small lake in the Northeast Kingdom of Vermont. In the middle of the week my husband went mountain biking for the day with a friend so I took the kids to a local Farmer's Market. It was one of those perfect VT afternoons when the breeze smells like wildflowers and softserve ice cream and the sky is an icy blue. There were all sorts of fabulous local wares to be purchased and veggies fresh from the garden. A hippie was playing the guitar and the kids were running around eating homemade caramel popcorn. I can feel my happiness in that moment even now as I type this.
There was a man originally from Jamaica at the market selling authentic Jamaican spices and food. He made jerk seasonings and meat rubs and this wonderful jambalaya-looking stew served over rice that everyone was devouring for lunch. He was playing Reggae out of the back of his van and had the Jamaican flag flying above his food stand. Obviously I wanted to learn his story and then hang out with him all day long.
After chatting for a while I learned that he had worked as a cook on a cruise ship 30 years ago which is when he met his wife - who was from Vermont. They fell in love, got married and proceeded to raise five children in the Green Mountain State. When he spoke about his wife his eyes lit up and he got the dreamy look of a young boy in love for the first time. Talking to this Jamaican guy was magic and made me feel high (which I wasn't).
The part that I will never forget is when I said to him "Wow - your life sounds amazing. You are so happy and this place is so beautiful, living here must be as wonderful as it looks." His response was simple, he said "Yeah mon, we walk slowly here." My eyes froze on his for way too long. It took what seemed like forever for me to process the enormity of what he was saying and how much I needed this in my own life. How lucky I was to have met him and to have shared this small yet powerful exchange.
I've been trying to walk more slowly ever since. The slower we walk the more we see, the less likely we are to trip and the more memorable the journey becomes.
