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Wednesday, July 15, 2015

first aid.


My four year old is an injury waiting to happen.  She is the only person I have ever met who manages to hurt herself while watching television.  One minute she'll be happily and comfortably watching PBS Kids, and the next she will become a gymnast, roll off the sofa and injure her ankle on the coffee table (cue the tears).  She can be standing still (not walking/not running/not moving) trip over absolutely nothing and smack her head on the ground (cue the tears).  

She has also been known to fall out of bed on occasion.  When I hear the dreaded 'thud' of her little body hitting the bedroom floor I fly out of bed and sprint into her room (with my heart beating way faster than anyone's should at three in the morning).  At which point I typically find her already curled up on the carpet next to her bed snoozing away soundly (cue my tears).  She's a pretty solid sleeper, that one.

Needless to say the girl is no stranger to some Neosporin and the all-important Mommy medical must have.  

The Hello Kitty Band-Aid.  
{Duh}


During the summer months when lakes, oceans and playgrounds are the norm the poor girl looks like someone put her in a burlap sack and whacked her legs with a baseball bat.  She is all scrapes and bruises to the extent that I sometimes get a little sweaty about bringing her to the pediatrician for something routine.  I always wonder if the doctor is looking at her thinking "How could any normal child have this many scrapes and bruises?  What did these parents do?  Put her in a burlap sack and hit her legs with a bat?"  

But...they always seem to let us leave the office with her.  So I guess that means they assume the truth - that she is a normal, active albeit seriously accident prone tot. 

At this point I have pretty much made worrying into a hobby/art form, so you might be surprised to hear that I don't spend too much time stressing about these minor childhood injuries.  As far as parenting goes, dealing with the physical bumps and bruises is easy-peasy-mac-and-cheesy (*Note: you know you spend lots of time with people under the age of ten when you can't say "easy" without adding the "peasy-mac-and-cheesy".*

Anyone with kids or anyone who was ever a kid themselves knows it isn't the scrapes and bruises on their body we really need to worry about.  The injuries we parents can't see are the problem... the little bumps and bruises that no amount of Neosporin can heal.  Those little emotional cuts can be real buggers. 

We adults know these unseen cuts are real, and sometimes lasting.  We know this because we have a past.  Some injuries are a series of little cuts that build up over time, like the name you were called as kid because you were "too" something (fat/smart/skinny/sporty/ sensitive/poor/different - whatever).

Some cuts are deeper.  The ones you assume you'll just have to live with because they're too deep to ever fully heal.

  Hateful words.  Traumatic experiences.  Separation.  Disappointment.  Shame.

Eventually, we all grow up until finally one day adulthood arrives and life does what life does best.  It surprises you.  And slowly, over the years, the Hello Kitty Band-Aids are applied one by one. 

Relationships are repaired.
Communication is restored.
Apologies are given.  


In the last month alone I have visited my past (or my past has visited me) in a surprising number of ways.  Here's some highlights from my own little 'A Christmas Carol':

BAND-AID #1
I attended my twenty year high school reunion.  Soooo, yeah. 
BAND-AID #2
I bumped into a college friend I had lost touch with entirely (after a falling out in our senior year) while playing with our kids at the ocean.  It felt good to see her and say hello after all those years.
BAND-AID #3
My family and I stayed in the same little lakeside cottage where I spent many summers in my 20's.  This special place holds a decade of memories for me and now I have made some new ones there with my kids.
{view from "the cottage"}
BAND-AID #4 {Also known as the best weekend ever}


My husband's first cousins from out of town came to stay with us.  Families are complicated, and for various reasons this was our first real opportunity to get to know them.  Perhaps this mama has applied one too many doses of antibiotic ointment this summer but all I could think to myself was that their time with us was like Neosporin for the soul.  We acted like family, we laughed like family, they loved our kids like family.  

Because we are family.
Bridget, me, Patrick, Frances, Vera and Austin

I watched in awe as three decades of separation were overcome with three days of togetherness.  And after "the girls" pulled out of our driveway everyone still left in the house agreed that something important had happened.  Some of those minor injuries that everyone had just learned to live with got a good dose of Neosporin and a rockin' Hello Kitty Band-Aid during our time together. 

It's beautiful really, what patience, a little time, an open mind, a loving heart can heal.  

It's summertime friends...get out and experience life (past or present) while the sun is still strong.  Just don't forget to bring along a first aid kit.