The Long Way Home.

Did you ever notice the best experiences are often the ones we didn’t see coming?  The best parties are those that didn't start out with a paper invitation in the mailbox.  The best family times aren’t the ones we spend thousands of dollars and months of our lives planning.

The best days of the warm weather months always seem to roll that way too, don’t they?  Those perfect days when one thing leads to another and another and before we know it, we’ve totally abandoned any agenda we might have had.  Those days when things just flow and we’re more than happy to let the to-do list go completely out the window (Market Basket will still be there tomorrow).  

I consider the day a success if by the time my head hits the pillow I am able to reflect back on three or more of the following:

• Spending more time outside than inside
• Cheering for my son’s perfect cannonball off the diving board
• Picking a wildflower and putting it in my hair
• Eating a PB&J
• Swimming in a river
• Wrapping my wet and shivering daughter up in a beach towel and hugging her close
• Drinking five Corona Lights (no, not all at once.  don't judge.)
• Laughing with friends
• Raising my face up to the sun “like a turtle” - as my mother always likes to say
• Having an unplanned adventure

The last point is kind of the secret ingredient to those killer experiences, isn’t it?  The high degree of fun we find in those precious days is usually the result of spontaneity…and getting a little lost.  Not in the literal sense of course, but rather taking a detour from the agenda.  The times we embrace the unexpected and just go wherever the road takes us, for as long as it takes us.  Forgetting about the clock and just enjoying the long way home.

(Norah Jones covering The Long Way Home. You're welcome.)

Getting a little lost isn’t exclusive to Sunday drives.  Sometimes we get lost on our own path, in our own lives – even inside our own selves.  We might feel for a time that we have lost that white-knuckle grip we had on our master plan for a happy life.  Maybe our priorities change, our needs change, our circumstances change, the family routine changes, or we simply change our minds.

Or better yet...we have changed.  

Sometimes we need to take a little detour to support a spouse who has taken a new job, or to help a graduating high school senior prepare for college and leave the nest.  Other times the detours are bigger. We welcome a new baby, go through a divorce, buy a new home, or relocate the family for professional reasons.  These are the times that can leave us feeling as though we've taken our hands off the wheel entirely.

It’s easy (and normal) to feel the urge to right the ship and get things “back on track” as quickly as possible - back to the steady state we knew so well.  We’re eager to return to the comfortable place we believe our happiness lived before change came along.  We say things like “it was easier before the second baby” or “maybe I should have just toughed it out at (Company X).  After all, I only had sixteen years left until retirement.” 

We think these things without realizing that the detour - the adventure - might be where our new happiness lives NOW.  Yes, these changes often challenge our idea of what things "should" look like, but they can also open the door to possibilities we don't even know existed because well...we just hadn’t gotten there yet.  And much like a carefree Sunday, going with the flow of life’s changes often yields the greatest rewards and is the surest path to happy times ahead.  We have all seen... 

• The painful divorce that ultimately clears the path for new love. 
• The cross-country relocation that creates a whole new level of family connectedness.
• The layoff that ends up being the catalyst to figuring out how we actually want to earn a living. 
• The colicky infant that steals our heart and becomes the love of our life. 

Don't resist taking a few detours in the warmer days ahead friends - make them yours and take advantage of the possibilities they hold.  Listen to live music at an outdoor venue.  Go camping and read a book to your kid by the firelight.  Pick a bouquet of wildflowers and make them your "centerpiece" at the dinner table.  Go for a bike ride.  Kiss someone when they least expect it.  Host an impromptu barbecue.  Jump off a rope swing (even if you didn't pack a bathing suit).

Embrace the experiences we can only enjoy by welcoming change. 

Put your face up to the sun like a turtle and drink in the sunshine.

Take the long way home.

Happy Sunday.  xo - juli